These moods...

This is the mood i worry about when im not in it. Right now I'm drifting in and out of it...

Its the mood where I worry what I may do...
Its the mood i worry about sinking too far into and perhaps never returning from...

Its the mood that unchains me in the most dangerous way...
I despeartly fear what may become of me if I ever slipped too far into it...

It would not be pleasant...
For anyone or thing that crossed me...
Regardless of how i end up in this mood, my fears are all that keep it in check. I have no wish to devastate a large chunk of western civilisation...

But in this mood, I honestly fear that one day I just may lose myself, forget all that holds me back... and do so...

I hope that day never passes... But the worst part of these moods is they hunger for it, they ravenously seek such final resolutions...

One day they may get it...
And then...
I dont know... I prefer not knowing...

Its safer if i don't...